*Written 11/1/2012
The day was April 2, 2012. I was on my way to see your great poppa Jim in the hospital. He had been admitted to Arkansas Heart Hospital due to some issues he was having. I was at the light of Shackleford & Kanis, waiting for the light to turn green. I received a text from your mom stating she was sorry, but she was pregnant. At first I just thought it was a late April Fool's joke. Your mom was 17 at the time, and a senior at Parkview. She was so close to graduating. At first I was shocked & sad & I did cry. A. lot. At the time it seemed the hopes and dreams I had for her, to not be like her momma, went up in smoke.
I went straight to the hospital to see my dad & I crawled in to my dad's bed & cried on his shoulder. I was scared, worried, mad, etc. I was safe with him to let down the walls. I felt I had done something wrong in the parenting field. That I let your mom down. I didn't do enough to protect her. After a good cry and talk with my dad, I then went to the school to check your mom out. The first thing we did was we went to a doctors office to confirm the pregnancy. Yep!she was pregnant. We had to schedule a ultrasound in a couple days to see how far long your momma was since she was unsure.
After that we went to talk to your mommy's dad, your Peepaw. Your mom was so scared to tell him, but she knew it had to be done. No turning back or hiding it now. She was so afraid that he was either going to yell at her, or turn his back on her & walk away. When we got to Peepaw's work he met us out back behind his work. Your mom immediately started tearing up & I asked her if she wanted me to tell him & she said yes. I immediately started tearing up as well and with a quivering voice I told Peepaw. After I told your Peepaw, he took your mom in his arms & just hugged & loved on her. Not at all what we were expecting! It.was.unconditional.love. The way a daddy is suppose to love his daughter. The look on his face was the pain I had for our daughter, but it was also sweet love for our daughter. It was a bitter sweet moment for all three of us. We all three hugged. Your mom was going to be a mom & she just grew up right then & there, right before our eyes.
After that your mom & I went to Krispy Kreme because when you find out major news like this, hot donuts make it all better! (One day soon, I'll take you when you can eat and introduce you to my love of hot donuts!) We just ended up spending the rest of the day together and lots of talking. LOTS of talking. I told her I wasn't disappointed in her, just in the action. I told her about what I went through when I got pregnant with her at 19. How my parents reacted and how I had felt. In a way, thank goodness I had walked in the same shoes, and the same path. I felt this prepared me for a moment as this.
My prayer that day and going forward was to be there, love her, guide her, and build her up. To help her to achieve her goals still, and that was to graduate high school, and continue to go to college. You see your mom had just gotten a scholarship, and I wasn't about to let her, let that go. Your mom is a strong mom, and a brave mom. I know you'll be proud of her. :) Just as I am.
Love, Gigi
